Aves de Papel

the skeletons in your closet far exceed mine, but I can’t carry this weight anymore.

I did go to those AA meetings, twice.
that was when I met the handsome gentleman who would continuously sell me cocaine.
I didn’t go to anymore meetings.
I did do that coke.
I did get bloody noses.
I did eat three meals a day.
and I would proceed to throw each of them up.
I stopped eating.
I started drinking.
I slept with boys who I thought loved me.
but they just passed the time.
I did slice myself up.
I did get stitches for it.
I did overdose.
and was hospitalized.
and flat lined.
I did get blackout drunk and drive home.
I did lie, and cheat, and manipulate everyone in my life.
but every time I heard your voice, all of that would fade. when I heard your voice, I was happy. I was healthy. I was in love. I was recovering.
I was lying, and I’m sorry.
I wanted to make you proud, to be your little girl.
but I couldn’t do that because I got scared.
I wasted too much time, ruined it.
but this time, I was given a second chance, and you weren’t. a chance I don’t deserve. and one you do.
so I will continue to live within this chance,
for you.
and I will make you proud.
and I will bring daisies to your grave so you don’t have to sleep alone.
daisies and sunsets and light falling snow.
I miss you, sleep tight, I love you, goodnight.  

Esto, justo aquí, es una de mis cosas favoritas de los últimos días. Lo he leído y releído, incluso lo he rebloggeado varias veces en mi tumblr.  Lo publicó una chica cuyo nombre no sé, pero su URL de tumblr es lovelikewolves. Sus palabras me impactaron y me hicieron sentir muchas cosas, lloré, sonreí, y volví a llorar, porque me pone triste y me alegra también, por la belleza contenida en el texto. Quería compartirlo con ustedes.

Las ama,

Lu.